Four books that helped me prepare to welcome my baby
When I was 7 months pregnant I took an online course dedicated for future moms by Alexandra Anykina. In my opinion, Alexandra is the most qualified and professional Russian-speaking author of such courses: focused on evidence-based medicine, child psychology and modern attachment theory. I found her both trustworthy, but also gentle and tactful in sharing the philosophy of motherhood she believes in and follows in raising her three children.
What I liked about her course is that it emphasized that our preparations should not be confined to delivering a baby into the world, but also focus on future changes in our lives and what being a parent means. There were lectures about breastfeeding, managing expectations and change in family dynamics, role of other family members in the first weeks of baby and new mom's life on top of expected lectures on how to breathe and push during the labor. In addition to the course, Alexandra shared an extensive list of books she recommends to read.
Each childbirth experience is different and unique. I understand that I was lucky enough not to experience any complications during my pregnancy and the birth of the baby. But apart of many factors, like having access to professional medical help, I found these four books extremely helpful when we welcomed our baby:
Labor
For practical guidance: The Birth Book: Everything You Need to Know to Have a Safe and Satisfying Birth by William Sears, M.D., and Martha Sears, R.N.
This book is the A-Z of the baby birth. Many practical advice on planning, nutrition, physical exercise; illustrations and detailed explanation of the process. I believe the more mom understands what is happening with her body, the calmer and safer the childbirth feels. It also focuses on how each mom should come up with her own approach to childbirth, and gently leads her in the safe direction.
For emotional guidance: Childbirth without Fear: The Principles and Practice of Natural Childbirth by Grantly Dick-Read.
Grantly Dick-Read wrote his first book on "natural childbirth" in the 1930s and was one of the earliest advocates of minimal medical interventions. He proposed an idea that fear and negative emotions associated with labor can actually halt the process and make it more difficult and painful for the woman. His ideas were ridiculed, but later in the 1940s he was able to gain popularity among general readership with the book titled Revelation of Childbirth later renamed to Childbirth without Fear.
Yes, this book is not perfect. The man born in 1890 was not familiar with modern ideas of feminism, but still his ideas of trusting woman's body and nature are worth reading and might help in making the childbirth as smooth as it can be.
Breastfeeding
For practical guidance: Breastfeeding Made Easy: A Gift for Life for You and Your Baby by Carlos González
I think moms do not share enough with others how challenging breastfeeding actually is. You have to teach your baby to eat properly in his first days, and it is not a pretty process. I followed the author's advice in the face of real-life problems like engorgement and it actually worked for me rather than other "life hacks" I found on Google.
I also love the author's writing style! I recently read another book My Child Won't Eat: How to Prevent and Solve the Problem. Both books are written with humor and ease, and you can sense this is not just another pediatrician, but a father himself.
For emotional guidance: The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding by La Leche League International.
La Leche League International is a non-profit organization that organizes advocacy, education and training related to breastfeeding. This book was written by mothers for mothers. As I mentioned earlier, breastfeeding was challenging, at times it felt like a sacrifice of a woman's body, comfort and her freedom, but this book helped me appreciate the beauty and value of this process, and changed my mind to see it as a unique way to connect and nurture the baby both physically and emotionally.
I will share other books and resources I found helpful on the bumpy road of parenting on this website. And if you are reading this as a future parent, I wish you and your baby health and all the joy in the world!